Infidelity, both emotional and physical, can ruin a relationship or at least to some extent damage it. However, there are people who have dealt with cheating partners and have survived and even restored their broken relationships.
Being involved with a man or woman who cheats on you can never be an easy thing to deal with. What makes matters worse is that very often, everyone around you might think they know what is best for you — but only lead you in the wrong direction.
Being involved with a man or woman who cheats on you can never be an easy thing to deal with. What makes matters worse is that very often, everyone around you might think they know what is best for you — but only lead you in the wrong direction.
Therefore, it is important for you to be equipped with the right kind of information about affairs, to be able to remove fact from fiction. Read on to know about the most common myths about affairs and clear any misconceived notion you might have:
There is a type
The myth: Most people think that a person who cheats is a ‘type’ and only those people would indulge in infidelity. Therefore, just because someone has a history of cheating they would probably cheat on every man or woman they are with. The reality: Given the right kind of circumstances anyone could be susceptible to cheating. Yes, while with some people it is a pattern, there are those who end up having an affair on an impulse and before they know it they are cheating on their partner. Therefore, do not live under the illusion that only a certain type of person will cheat. To be on the safe side, you and your partner could admit honestly to each other what circumstances could make you slip and then just avoid those situations.
Boredom leads to affairs
The myth: It is a common myth that most affairs are a result of long-term boredom that one of the two lovers might be feeling. The reality: This is not true at all. Boredom has nothing to do with infidelity. If people feel bored they develop a hobby — not cheat on their partners. If both partners decide that they want to give their union another shot, it’s important to figure out what the real factors are that contributed to the affair and whether there’s any hope for changing them.
Affairs ruin marriages
The myth: If a husband or a wife cheats on their respective partner the marriage is over. The reality: There is no denying that if your partner has an affair, it will taint your relationship and might even end it, but that is not always the case. With time and effort, it’s possible to renew communication, trust and intimacy. Many couples not only survive an affair but after they work things out they feel more intimately connected and have a better marriage. This is because once the affair is in the open, if there is any hope left for the relationship , it is important that the couple actually discuss the affair. It might be painful but at least the two parties involved will be able to discuss the problems and then find solutions.
The betrayed partner knows
The myth: The person who is being cheated on at some level always knows that their partner is straying. The reality: In many cases, the betrayed spouse is totally in the dark. It’s also common after an affair is exposed for the betrayed spouse to feel like he or she is facing a new truth. You never can be sure whether your partner will cheat. Usually, it’s not until the affair is out in the open that the betrayed spouse can go back and understand why their partner was probably staying out late or making too many excuses for not being around too often.
Affairs are a result of love
The myth: Another popular but wrong belief about affairs is that the adulterer finds happiness in the person who he or she is having an affair with and they are in the affair because of mutual love. The reality: No matter how blissful they feel, affair pairings rarely get to ‘happily ever after.’ The reason a man or woman would have an affair is rarely because of love but mostly as a reaction to stress in their current relationship. Yes, in some cases they do end up together, but in most cases the affair ends regardless of what happens to the adulterer’s other relationship. An affair remains just that — and seldom turns into a relationship. In that context, the 17th century French author and moralist, François De La Rochefoucauld’s words ring true: The struggle we undergo to remain faithful to one we love is better than infidelity.
There is a type
The myth: Most people think that a person who cheats is a ‘type’ and only those people would indulge in infidelity. Therefore, just because someone has a history of cheating they would probably cheat on every man or woman they are with. The reality: Given the right kind of circumstances anyone could be susceptible to cheating. Yes, while with some people it is a pattern, there are those who end up having an affair on an impulse and before they know it they are cheating on their partner. Therefore, do not live under the illusion that only a certain type of person will cheat. To be on the safe side, you and your partner could admit honestly to each other what circumstances could make you slip and then just avoid those situations.
Boredom leads to affairs
The myth: It is a common myth that most affairs are a result of long-term boredom that one of the two lovers might be feeling. The reality: This is not true at all. Boredom has nothing to do with infidelity. If people feel bored they develop a hobby — not cheat on their partners. If both partners decide that they want to give their union another shot, it’s important to figure out what the real factors are that contributed to the affair and whether there’s any hope for changing them.
Affairs ruin marriages
The myth: If a husband or a wife cheats on their respective partner the marriage is over. The reality: There is no denying that if your partner has an affair, it will taint your relationship and might even end it, but that is not always the case. With time and effort, it’s possible to renew communication, trust and intimacy. Many couples not only survive an affair but after they work things out they feel more intimately connected and have a better marriage. This is because once the affair is in the open, if there is any hope left for the relationship , it is important that the couple actually discuss the affair. It might be painful but at least the two parties involved will be able to discuss the problems and then find solutions.
The betrayed partner knows
The myth: The person who is being cheated on at some level always knows that their partner is straying. The reality: In many cases, the betrayed spouse is totally in the dark. It’s also common after an affair is exposed for the betrayed spouse to feel like he or she is facing a new truth. You never can be sure whether your partner will cheat. Usually, it’s not until the affair is out in the open that the betrayed spouse can go back and understand why their partner was probably staying out late or making too many excuses for not being around too often.
Affairs are a result of love
The myth: Another popular but wrong belief about affairs is that the adulterer finds happiness in the person who he or she is having an affair with and they are in the affair because of mutual love. The reality: No matter how blissful they feel, affair pairings rarely get to ‘happily ever after.’ The reason a man or woman would have an affair is rarely because of love but mostly as a reaction to stress in their current relationship. Yes, in some cases they do end up together, but in most cases the affair ends regardless of what happens to the adulterer’s other relationship. An affair remains just that — and seldom turns into a relationship. In that context, the 17th century French author and moralist, François De La Rochefoucauld’s words ring true: The struggle we undergo to remain faithful to one we love is better than infidelity.
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