Does the sight of a friend getting ready for Friday night’s movie-and-dinner routine make you want to crawl under the covers and cry all night? Or do you get the blues every time a colleague croons ‘It’s only words...’? Are you single and feeling sorry for yourself?
Just STOP. Stop all the self-pity, stop inflicting yourself with pain. For a moment ask yourself: are you really lonely or do you want to be in a relationship just because its ‘cool’ and all your friends have one. A beau we mean. Heck, even Kantabai seems to have that ‘dreamy look’ in her eyes lately. Do you really want the phone running off the hook and having your newfound love ask you about your whereabouts every single minute of the day? Do you really want to tag him or her along wherever you go, be it to buy your favourite lingerie or to the spa or an IPL match? Do you really want to be told what to wear and that your favourite jeans are so passé? And worst of all, do you want to stop talking to all your guy/girl friends you’ve known for years only because your partner feels insecure about them?
If you are still trying to find the answers to these questions, it is time to sit back and think...
Is ‘love’ suffocating you?
Quite often, though not always, ‘love’ becomes suffocating after a while. At times, so much so that people feel that they are losing their own identity and being only what their loved one wants them to be.
“I was in love with a guy for two years. I don’t remember any weekend when I had the freedom to go shopping alone or hang out with my friends. My boyfriend assumed that my weekends are only for him. I gave up talking to most of my friends who were guys only because he felt insecure with them. Finally, I decided to break up with him and I realised that I had being losing my identity over the years. Now I am happily single and have all the freedom to do what I want to do without being answerable to anyone,” says Satnam who works in a private bank.
Want to be happily single?
Your best friend may be in a relationship that is just getting on her nerves and your cousin’s marriage may be no better than routine household work, then why is it that people feel sorry for you being single? In fact, being single may be the most wonderful thing that could have happened to you. If you are not convinced yet, check out what’s the fun in being single...
•You can go out shopping alone without getting frantic phone calls from your partner to know your whereabouts.
•You can pamper yourself by experimenting with your looks without getting worried whether he or she will like it or not.
•You can go out with all your friends and flirt to your heart’s content without anyone stopping you from doing so. And, if you are still thinking whether this is the right thing to do, don’t trust your ‘conscience’, for it will never stop you from doing anything wrong, it’ll only stop you from enjoying it!
•Grab a packet of popcorn and go out to watch your favourite romantic film without any one to laugh at you for sobbing through the film. Do all the things you love to do and have been missing out in the last few days. (in case you were recently in a relationship and just called it a day)
•Ignore the toxic people in your life, who would tell you that you are single only because you are too ‘picky’, too fat or too old to be in love.
Being single and loving it!
“I’ve been single for the last one year. It’s not that I haven’t got proposals but I just love my freedom. It’s true that being in a relationship gives you a companion but after a while it also starts interfering with your privacy. I think it’s also about setting priorities. My career is much more important to me than being in a relationship and I think I’ll lose my focus if I am committed to someone,” says Nandita (name changed on request), a software engineer.
While it’s true that companionship is a beautiful part of a relationship, privacy is equally important. The tricky part is keeping the balance and knowing where to draw the line. As Arvinder Singh, a psychotherapist and consultant, says, “The most beautiful relationships are the ones that give you space. You can go places if your partner is supportive. So, being in a relationship may not necessarily mean that you lose your independence. Sometimes, spending time alone can also get difficult.”
Being single is not always easy; there are times when you just want to share that special moment with someone....but till that special someone comes along, enjoy some ‘me time’!
Just STOP. Stop all the self-pity, stop inflicting yourself with pain. For a moment ask yourself: are you really lonely or do you want to be in a relationship just because its ‘cool’ and all your friends have one. A beau we mean. Heck, even Kantabai seems to have that ‘dreamy look’ in her eyes lately. Do you really want the phone running off the hook and having your newfound love ask you about your whereabouts every single minute of the day? Do you really want to tag him or her along wherever you go, be it to buy your favourite lingerie or to the spa or an IPL match? Do you really want to be told what to wear and that your favourite jeans are so passé? And worst of all, do you want to stop talking to all your guy/girl friends you’ve known for years only because your partner feels insecure about them?
If you are still trying to find the answers to these questions, it is time to sit back and think...
Is ‘love’ suffocating you?
Quite often, though not always, ‘love’ becomes suffocating after a while. At times, so much so that people feel that they are losing their own identity and being only what their loved one wants them to be.
“I was in love with a guy for two years. I don’t remember any weekend when I had the freedom to go shopping alone or hang out with my friends. My boyfriend assumed that my weekends are only for him. I gave up talking to most of my friends who were guys only because he felt insecure with them. Finally, I decided to break up with him and I realised that I had being losing my identity over the years. Now I am happily single and have all the freedom to do what I want to do without being answerable to anyone,” says Satnam who works in a private bank.
Want to be happily single?
Your best friend may be in a relationship that is just getting on her nerves and your cousin’s marriage may be no better than routine household work, then why is it that people feel sorry for you being single? In fact, being single may be the most wonderful thing that could have happened to you. If you are not convinced yet, check out what’s the fun in being single...
•You can go out shopping alone without getting frantic phone calls from your partner to know your whereabouts.
•You can pamper yourself by experimenting with your looks without getting worried whether he or she will like it or not.
•You can go out with all your friends and flirt to your heart’s content without anyone stopping you from doing so. And, if you are still thinking whether this is the right thing to do, don’t trust your ‘conscience’, for it will never stop you from doing anything wrong, it’ll only stop you from enjoying it!
•Grab a packet of popcorn and go out to watch your favourite romantic film without any one to laugh at you for sobbing through the film. Do all the things you love to do and have been missing out in the last few days. (in case you were recently in a relationship and just called it a day)
•Ignore the toxic people in your life, who would tell you that you are single only because you are too ‘picky’, too fat or too old to be in love.
Being single and loving it!
“I’ve been single for the last one year. It’s not that I haven’t got proposals but I just love my freedom. It’s true that being in a relationship gives you a companion but after a while it also starts interfering with your privacy. I think it’s also about setting priorities. My career is much more important to me than being in a relationship and I think I’ll lose my focus if I am committed to someone,” says Nandita (name changed on request), a software engineer.
While it’s true that companionship is a beautiful part of a relationship, privacy is equally important. The tricky part is keeping the balance and knowing where to draw the line. As Arvinder Singh, a psychotherapist and consultant, says, “The most beautiful relationships are the ones that give you space. You can go places if your partner is supportive. So, being in a relationship may not necessarily mean that you lose your independence. Sometimes, spending time alone can also get difficult.”
Being single is not always easy; there are times when you just want to share that special moment with someone....but till that special someone comes along, enjoy some ‘me time’!
No comments:
Post a Comment